Accountability Process for Buddhi Dana

Welcome to the Safe Mediation page dedicated to the accountability process for Buddhi Dana, tantra facilitator, ISTA faculty and sexuality coach.

Back in 2022, members of the sacred sexuality community voiced concerns about Buddhi Dana. Public discussions have emphasized the importance of understanding boundaries, consent, power dynamics and cultural sensitivity, especially in fields like Sacred Sexuality. Safe Mediation understands the nature of these concerns and is committed to addressing them with sensitivity and respect.

While there were times in the past when Buddhi Dana’s public responses were marked by defensiveness and strong reactions (fight response), he has volunteered to participate in this Accountability Process and has consistently expressed to Safe Mediation a growing intention to engage in mutual understanding, accountability, transparency, and healing.

Buddhi Dana is willing to take full responsibility for his actions and contributions to any past interactions that might have affected another person in a negative way. We have his heartfelt commitment to listen to feedback, learn, and convey his genuine apologies.

Safe Mediation is here to ensure a balanced, respectful and empathetic approach to all involved. Our approach leaves no room for any defensive or dismissive behaviour. The aim is to understand all perspectives and work towards a space of shared understanding and resolution.

We appreciate Buddhi Dana’s engagement in this process of self-responsibility and healing. We understand that this process may not be perfect and that everyone’s needs may not be met; nonetheless, our shared intention is to create the safety to facilitate communication exchanges with mutual understanding, trust, and receptivity. We believe this process amounts to many steps in the right direction.

If you have any questions, requests, or concerns about this process, please reach out to us in the form below. We are eager to receive your input on how we can continually enhance and optimize this process.

Understanding the Foundations: Our Approach to Accountability and Restorative Justice

An Accountability Process is a structured approach for individuals or organizations to address concerns. These processes often involve integral community participation, including those accountable, all affected parties and community members, to collaboratively address and resolve issues.

An accountability process provides a platform for those who have been affected to share their experiences while enabling those involved to take responsibility and embark on a journey of positive change. Through mediation and facilitated conversations, we operate within the community, using this process to promote personal and communal transformation.

This Accountability Process is based on Restorative Justice, which is an inclusive and voluntary approach to addressing grievances and concerns. It focuses on healing, mutual understanding, and repair. This process allows individuals to express their feelings and needs, while those accountable can better understand the consequences of their actions, take responsibility, and prevent future harm.

In practicing fierce compassion, this approach isn’t just about healing. It also involves firmly tackling and solving problems to prevent harm and balancing kindness towards people as a strong way of dealing with issues.

The ultimate goal of Restorative Justice is to build stronger, more harmonious communities based on trust and mutual respect. Its core values include voluntary participation, taking responsibility, empathy, healing, restoration, and balance.

A Restorative Justice-based Accountability Process is not punitive or adversarial in nature. Here are some key points to clarify what it is not:

  • Not Adversarial: It does not set up a confrontational scenario where one party is pitted against another. It encourages collaboration and dialogue amongst all parties involved .
  • Not About Guilt or Innocence: It does not primarily focus on proving guilt or innocence in a legal sense. Instead, it seeks to acknowledge the impact of actions and promote personal responsibility.
  • Not Taking Sides: While it emphasizes fairness, it does not involve taking sides in a conflict. The mediator’s role is to facilitate the process, ensuring that all parties have an equal voice and that solutions are collaboratively determined. The mediator does not take a position or side.
  • Not Isolated: It does not treat incidents in isolation. It considers the broader context and aims to address underlying issues and prevent future harm.
  • Not One-Size-Fits-All: It does not follow a rigid formula. Restorative Justice-based Accountability Processes are adaptable and tailored to each unique situation.

In summary, it is a process that emphasizes understanding, healing, and repair rather than punishment, adversarial proceedings, or rigid legal structures.

At Safe Mediation, we are deeply committed to respecting the confidentiality and transparency of all parties involved in Buddhi Dana’s accountability process. Our approach is anchored in the belief that trust is built through a careful balance of these two principles. We assure you that every detail shared in this process, whether it’s your name, story, or personal information, is held in strict confidence. This information is accessible only to designated Safe Mediation team members, and is not disclosed without your explicit consent. We understand that transparency is a journey, growing as more individuals feel safe to share their experiences. As this trust develops, we anticipate more stories being shared with a broader audience, always with the utmost respect for your privacy.

In instances where we use information for broader awareness, we often employ fictitious names to protect identities, always indicating this with a “(not their real name)” notation. This practice allows us to maintain confidentiality while still fostering collective understanding and growth. We recognize the emotional complexities of this process and are dedicated to providing a neutral, professional, and hopeful environment. Our goal is to create a safe space where everyone feels supported, understood, and valued, contributing to a culture of healing and positive change. If you have any questions or concerns about our approach, we encourage open dialogue to ensure your comfort and trust in our process.

Addressing Areas of Concern

In our review of the feedback and observations regarding practices in professional settings within the sacred sexuality field, including those involving Buddhi Dana, we have identified main areas of concern. It is important to emphasize that this review is based on limited feedback and does not necessarily represent all experiences. Our aim is to provide a balanced perspective while respecting everyone’s confidentiality and experiences. As we hear more from people, we’ll keep updating our understanding and working towards a safer, more respectful environment for everyone involved.

Our observations indicate that there are instances in professional settings involving intimate interactions where the dynamics sometimes led to discomfort. This includes scenarios where the intensity or nature of certain practices involving intimate interaction may not align with the expectations or comfort levels of all participants. These observations are based on a limited number of reports and do not represent a widespread pattern. They highlight the importance of clear communication, somatic consent, and sensitivity to individual boundaries in all professional interactions.

Another area of focus is the dynamics in collaborative teaching environments. Concerns have been raised about maintaining trust and adhering to agreed-upon boundaries and guidelines, particularly in contexts that involve close personal interactions. While these concerns do not necessarily involve direct complaints from participants, they reflect the need for a consistent and mutual understanding of professional boundaries and agreements among co-teachers and facilitators.

We’ve identified an important issue related to how facilitators respond to feedback and concerns. This issue centers around situations where participants have tried to discuss their experiences or problems but haven’t felt properly supported or understood by the facilitator. This kind of situation can lead to feelings of being invalidated or not taken seriously. Addressing this effectively means ensuring that facilitators are not only skilled in their field but also in empathetic communication and genuinely addressing participants’ concerns.

Buddhi Dana’s Steps Towards Accountability

In August 2022, Buddhi Dana initiated a restorative justice process by appointing Lior Gal Cohen, an Israeli mediator, to collect feedback from those who had grievances but preferred not to engage with him directly. Buddhi and Lior announced this initiative in Israel and seven people came forward to provide feedback. Most of these related to inappropriate behaviour given Buddhi Dana’s position of authority.

Lior talked to the people, but didn’t tell Buddhi Dana who they were. This was to keep their identities private. So, Lior only shared the overall issues with Buddhi Dana, without giving away any details that could identify the people. Buddhi Dana was upset because he didn’t get enough details to fully understand what he did wrong. He wanted to know more, but Lior couldn’t tell him more because of her promise to keep people’s stories private. Lior hoped Buddhi Dana would still understand how his actions affected the community. But it was tough for both of them – Buddhi Dana felt frustrated because he didn’t have all the information, and Lior thought Buddhi Dana wasn’t getting the point. Since they couldn’t find a way to solve this, they decided to stop working together in October 2022.

In recent reflections shared with Safe Mediation, Buddhi Dana has expressed deep gratitude towards Lior for her support in the early stages of his journey. He acknowledges her trust in the process, her assistance with precise wording, and her attentive listening to all involved parties.

From August 2022 to February 2023, Buddhi Dana actively reached out to three individuals he thought might have concerns about him. Additionally, two people approached Buddhi Dana directly, and there was one clearing conversation initiated by both sides. Buddhi Dana consulted Lior for advice on how to handle some of these discussions effectively. However, these were private conversations between Buddhi Dana and each person, without Lior or Safe Mediation involved.

Buddhi Dana had six clearing conversations:

  • 3 initiated by Buddhi Dana, with Willow (peer student), Jasmine (community member), and Sage (peer facilitator) – (note: not their real names)
  • 2 where individuals reached out to him: Aster (former client) and Ivy (community member) – (note: not their real names)
  • 1 mutually initiated: with Rose, peer facilitator – (note: not her real name)

Later in 2023, Safe Mediation asked Buddhi Dana to contact these individuals to see if they were open to speaking with us. Our goal is to check if they feel their concerns have been fully addressed. Safe Mediation has given consent to contact three people.

  • Willow (not her heal name) expressed to Safe Mediation a willingness for a mediated conversation with Buddhi Dana to discuss some unresolved issues. Safe Mediation is currently facilitating this process.
  • Jasmine (not her heal name) and Safe Mediation had initial contact, but not yet a conversation about this matter.
  • Rose has already shared her experiences with us, and at present, no further conversations are planned with her.
  • Aster and Sage (not their real names) have not yet responded to Buddhi Dana’s inquiry up to this date.
  • Ivy (not her heal name): Buddhi Dana does not have her current contact information, which limits our ability to reach out.

If you have had a direct clearing conversation with Buddhi Dana and recognize yourself in this description, please feel free to reach out to Safe Mediation using the form below. Your experience and privacy are important to us, and this process is designed to support you. We treat it confidentially and will respect your privacy. This process is here to help you address your concerns and have your experience acknowledged.

In October 2022, Buddhi Dana asked Safe Mediation to help him be accountable on a larger, international scale. Safe Mediation talked with Lior, who had worked with Buddhi Dana in Israel. Safe Mediation gained valuable insights from Lior into the concerns raised and the efforts already made. Lior was open and caring, and agreed to ask people who had shared their stories with her if they were willing to talk to Safe Mediation. One person agreed to this, showing Lior’s professional and understanding approach.

In early 2023, Safe Mediation helped Buddhi Dana talk with an activist about concerns in the sacred sexuality field. Buddhi Dana started this talk, wanting to address public concerns. Safe Mediation also listened to others who had worries about Buddhi Dana, trying to understand all perspectives. It was hard to check some of the details because there were no direct witnesses, but Safe Mediation carefully considered everything we heard to stay fair and unbiased.

In late 2023, Safe Mediation’s work transitioned into a formal accountability process. We began reaching out to individuals who had past clearing conversations with Buddhi Dana, aiming to ensure they felt their concerns were properly addressed. We also reviewed feedback from Buddhi Dana’s previous students. Most of this feedback was positive, but we are approaching this information carefully and impartially, understanding the diverse opinions in the community. This balanced review helps us assess the impact of Buddhi Dana’s teaching and practices.

Looking ahead, Safe Mediation is committed to gathering feedback from Buddhi Dana’s future students and co-facilitators. This step is crucial for monitoring the effectiveness of his ongoing improvements and ensuring a safe and respectful environment for all participants. Our goal is to provide clear, ongoing assurance to the community about the responsible and constructive nature of our accountability work.

January 2024

“Dear Community,

I would like to address the grievances and concerns that have been brought to my attention. I acknowledge the experiences shared by those who felt impacted by my actions, and I deeply apologize for any distress caused. I realize now that there were times when my understanding was limited, and I may not have fully grasped the perspectives and feelings of those who tried to communicate their concerns to me. For this, I am sincerely sorry. It is important to me to understand and validate these experiences, and I am committed to repairing any harm done.

In reflection, I recognize that there were times when my approach could have been more sensitive to individual boundaries and the complex nature of consent. My understanding of these critical aspects was not as comprehensive as it should have been, and for this, I am truly sorry. I see now how crucial it is to create a safe and respectful space for everyone involved in my workshops and trainings.

Moving forward, I am dedicated to making significant changes in my practices. This includes a stronger emphasis on consent and boundaries, a trauma-informed approach to facilitation, and continuous feedback and learning. I am committed to fostering an environment of safety, trust, and empowerment for all participants. My goal is to ensure that my workshops are places of healing, growth, and mutual respect.

I am actively working on integrating these changes and will continually seek to improve both personally and professionally. I value each person’s voice and experience and am dedicated to upholding the highest standards of respect and care in my work.

Thank you for your trust and patience as I navigate this path of learning and growth. Your feedback and support are invaluable to me in this journey.

With sincere gratitude and commitment,

Buddhi Dana”

Trainings and Supervision

As part of Safe Mediation’s comprehensive review, we have verified during this accountability process, that Buddhi Dana enrolled and participated in trainings and supervision sessions focusing on trauma awareness/trauma informed practice. These courses collectively signify Buddhi Dana’s commitment to becoming a more trauma-informed facilitator. Safe Mediation has taken due diligence in confirming these educational endeavors to ensure the credibility and sincerity of Buddhi Dana’s professional development efforts.

  • ISITTA Foundations

    (22nd August – 30th September, 2022): An online course on trauma-informed somatic psychotherapy. This program provided Buddhi Dana with foundational knowledge in trauma therapy from a somatic perspective.

  • Somatic-Dynamic Therapy for Therapists (30th June – 9th July, 2022): This hands-on course equipped Buddhi Dana with tools from osteopathy, poly-vagal theory, and behavioral psychology. Following his first attendance in January 2022, Buddhi Dana invited the course teacher to offer this 6-day program at his Tantra Therapy School in June 2022.
  • LiveTantra’s Trauma-Informed Training for Tantra Professionals (25th February – 8th April, 2022): A specialized training program designed for Tantra Teachers and Workshop Facilitators to become more trauma-aware. This course expanded Buddhi Dana’s understanding of how to integrate trauma-informed practices into Tantra facilitation.
  • Owning Harm – Mischa Byruck (14th October): A course focusing on recognizing and owning the impact of one’s actions, particularly in the context of harm and healing.
  • Power – Mischa Byruck (23rd October): A course delving into the dynamics of power, its impact, and responsible use, especially relevant for those in positions of influence and leadership.
Since October 2022, Buddhi Dana has been attending weekly therapeutic sessions with Moran Simon, a clinical social worker specializing in sexual trauma. These consistent and regular sessions are focused on helping Buddhi Dana gain a deeper understanding of his own sexual trauma and how it has influenced his behaviors and affected others throughout his life. These sessions are still ongoing to this date.

Learnings applied in Buddhi Dana’s Practices

This section highlights the important commitments Buddhi Dana has made in response to the community’s feedback. These changes show his willigness to making his workshops and trainings safer and more inclusive for everyone. Here, we lay out how Buddhi is improving the ways he handles consent, boundaries, and taking care of each person’s emotional needs. We aim to ensure that Buddhi’s new ways of working are in line with the principles of safety, understanding, and care for all participants.

These adaptations encompass several dimensions, as you see below.

  1. Consent, boundaries, and emotional well-being will be emphasised in all of Buddhi Dana’s workshops and trainings. A safer and professional environment will be fostered for all. A commitment to clear boundaries and guidelines between workshop leaders, assistant teams and participants/students will be communicated and upheld.
  2. No sexual interactions between the teaching team and participants shall occur in any workshops Buddhi Dana facilitates, nor within the 3 month cooling off period after the training. After this 3-month period, facilitators are still expected to exercise caution to avoid potential exploitation or power dynamics issues.
  3. Inform participants well about transpersonal relations to prevent any misinterpretations or bypassing. This includes setting up the safer space so individual boundaries can be safely expressed.
  1. Workshops will encompass grounding exercises, mindful check-ins and foster a sense of community and support among participants.
  2. Workshop facilitators/assistants will pay close attention to the individual needs of each participant as it is understood that each person’s experiences and triggers are unique.
  3. Trauma-informed language and practices will be interwoven into every aspect of Buddhi Dana’s facilitation. This commitment includes the use of inclusive and empowering language, providing trigger warnings when appropriate and upholding participants’ boundaries and consent at all times.
  4. As part of deepening participants’ comprehension of trauma and resilience, educational components on trauma theory such as, its impact on the nervous system and the significance of self-care and self-compassion will be integrated into Buddhi Dana’s trainings and workshops. This knowledge will empower participants to develop a more compassionate understanding of trauma and equip them with tools for their own continued healing journey.
  5. The bedrock of Buddhi’s workshop content will be the principles of safety, trust, choice, collaboration and empowerment.
  6. Buddhi Dana will also emphasize self-care and self-regulation throughout the workshops, offering practical tools such as guided visualizations, breathing exercises and self-reflection activities to enhance emotional regulation and well-being – self-regulation – giving tools to participants so they can recognise when they are triggered and feel empowered with the knowledge and techniques to self-regulate.
  1. Buddhi Dana is committed to listening and validating participants’ voices during and after workshops.
  2. In order to provide participants with the most valuable experiences possible, Buddhi Dana will seek feedback and encourage all participants to complete the feedback form made easily available to them. This regular feedback will help to continuously improve Buddhi Dana’s professional learning and practice.
  3. Along with the feedback form pertaining to the specific workshop, a feedback link for Safe Mediation will also be provided to participants. If any participant feels they wish to provide feedback to or lodge a grievance (either anonymously or not) with an independent external party they have the information to do so.

Here you find the code of ethics and guidelines that Buddhi Dana has implemented in 2023 as a result of the accountability process. The code of ethics is to ensure that his trainings and workshops are safer and trauma-informed so as to promote the care and protection of all participants.

This code serves as a set of guidelines for dealing with any circumstances that may arise during the events and aims to provide clarity to participants upfront. The code is designed to educate participants, professionals, and the general public about the ethical standards upheld by Buddhi Dana and his co-facilitators. Buddhi Dana is committed to inform participants about these guidelines in every professional engagement.

Thank you for visiting the Accountability Process for Buddhi Dana page. This page is currently being updated. Meanwhile, we want to ensure that everyone’s voices are heard, so please get in touch.

We invite you to use this form to reach out to us with any questions, comments, or requests you may have regarding the process. This includes any feedback you may have on how we can continue to improve the process for all parties involved.

We are committed to making things right and welcome your input. Thank you for your time and consideration.

Intake form Confidentiality note: Safe Mediation is the only one with access to this form. Neither your name nor your message is shared with Buddhi Dana and/or other 3rd parties and/or the general public without your consent.